What we remember

I tend to remember the parts of this trip that, obviously, I have thought about at different times over the past 39+ years. For some of it, I have no photos. I remember a few moments of our night to the local winery, owned by a host family. I remember drinking, for my age, quite a bit of wine and laughing a lot with Peter Reinhardt. Sadly, my camera must have been back at the house. 

I received a message back yesterday from one of the German exchange students. I had asked her if she had any connections to her classmates from so long ago and she said she didn't. She doesn't even recall many of their names. I sent a photo (shown earlier in the blog) of all of the German students on the last night in the States, because it has all their names. She said that she remembered very little of a few of her classmates. 

I've got to say, even though I haven't seen some of the American students over the years, I remember quite a bit about them, except for a few that came along from East High. But for one of the East students, I haven't seen them since our trip. Certainly a few of my classmates I'd love to see more often, particularly one of the kindest fellows I know, Chris Bradle. He's out in Pittsburgh. Here's a photo of him from our travels:

Here's Chris with his (probably) 60s era viewfinder camera. I believe this is from our afternoon in Heidelberg.

With Chris I have the advantage of having known him since middle school, or perhaps even grade school. For a few years in high school, he was my ride to LaFollette each day. After college, however, I don't think I saw him until I had a German Exchange reunion in 2012 and he came over to the house for a couple of hours. So do I really know him much anymore?

When I look at the faces and names from the group of Germans in our exchange, I'm not sure I even had an extended conversation with much more than half of them. With those I did spend more time with, I feel like I had some understanding of who they are, or at least who they were. I'm of the belief that people don't fundamentally change much once they're that old. I run into people I haven't seen for decades and their personalities are pretty much the same. Perhaps they have calmed down a bit, or they're a little more introspective. That's just age, though. 

Here are Mike, Lindy (aka Linda), Chris, and Brian from September of 2012.

Nevertheless, it would be a joy to see any and all of them again. I had the pleasure of spending an evening with Claudia when she visited Kathy Grzenia Pierce a few years ago. I spent a little time with Funda when I stayed with Rudiger in 1987. I have seen some of Thorsten on Facebook. The others, however, who knows where they are or even if they're all still living? Unfortunately we have lost many classmates since graduation. To my knowledge, none of those from the exchange have passed, but we also don't know where everyone is.

Some people aren't fond of reunions and sometimes it's because of haunting memories from high school. No doubt, if things had been awful for me, I would have likely stayed away. For most of us, however, I think you should try a reunion before you dismiss the idea altogether. Our recollections can not only connect us with one another, they can also help us make sense of ourselves. I have a strong suspicion that some of my exchange mates can't believe I haven't 'moved on' from this time. Believe me, I have moved "on", or at least moved beyond it. I also know that time informed some of my beliefs, and some of my attitudes. It can be a powerful thing to, once you have view of your own culture in the context of another, question why we live the way we do. So, yes, I really enjoyed that brief time in Germany, but I also value it for how it opened me up to new possibilities and different points of view.

Dinner with Claudia and her husband at Kathy's house, 2018.